Stop
IRONY: 3 a (1) : incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result.
I have always envied those who state they don’t care what people think. Most of my life I have been denying, much to everyone’s chagrin, that I do not care what people think of me. When life left me with nothing to worry about but myself, I realized the irony of caring about opinions of me caused people to think what I did not want them to think of me.
I’ve learned, most, naturally express what they need and act against it. I have proudly professed, “Even stupid people ain’t stupid.” But I thought I could fool them with my words and behaviors. In trying to be what I thought everyone wanted. I was not me. Now, I know even stupid people can see if I am true to myself. I believe everyone has a purpose and we all carry knowledge of universal truths. There must be bad to know good. There must be ugly, stupid, mean, jealous, people to know beauty, intelligence and those worthy of your love. I care about opinions and I no longer feel weak for admitting me.
Without denial, what I send out to others comes back to me.
If you want to be appreciated, then you must think about what others think of you. They are your teachers- what you think of them teaches you about your fears, hopes, and what you covet. When you are sure of your convictions do not waver; you are being you. When you find something about yourself that you do not like, ask why. Are you denying who you really are and what will make you happy? Are your repetitions of behavior and reactions perpetuating what makes you unhappy?
Everyone can change. Everyone can have what they want. Everyone can be loved. You may have to give up all that you know about your life, but whenever you stop, you are reborn.
A former computer professor turned writer, Patti Pacifico has combined elements of film, music, and publishing to create the world’s first digi-tome, “life”. From losing everything she learned to hear her creativity and search for those interested in a different way of learning and beautiful way of living.
